Wednesday, 7 September 2011

Review: Spartacus: Blood and Sand

I’m quite into ancient history, and have a couple of books on gladiators, so I was hopeful this might prove quite enjoyable, and it was.

Sex and violence are popular, and Spartacus: Blood and Sand has lashings of both. There is not, I think, a single episode that lacks a gore-soaked orgy of death and few (maybe none) without sexual encounters (mostly heterosexual but with the odd spot of man-on-man action). This is not suitable for people who are even remotely prudish or squeamish (quite a lot is seen in both regards) but for adults who are neither of those things it provides plenty of exciting entertainment.

Whilst the plot will not rival the epic I, Claudius, it is nevertheless pretty good and fast-moving. Filler episodes there are not. The fall and rise of Spartacus and the woes and glory that befall him is well told, and feature a range of sly and loathsome antagonists.

The trials and tribulations of the splendid bastard Batiatus, the lanista (master) of the gladiator school to which Spartacus belongs are quite enthralling. John Hannah plays Batiatus to perfection, and he and Lucy Lawless as his devious wife Lucretia make a very good double act.

Many members of the cast (predictably given the nature of the storyline) end up dead, though not necessarily the ones that might be expected. The general quality of acting could be better, but it’s a series of sex and violence and this doesn’t detract from it much.

Whether someone who does not share my interest in ancient history or who dislikes oodles of blood and death will like it quite so much, I don’t know. But, for me, it was a surprisingly good series that I very much enjoyed.

Sadly, the lead (Andy Whitfield) will not be able to reprise the role due to cancer. He has given his blessing to Liam McIntyre who will assume the role in the forthcoming second (proper) series Spartacus: Vengeance.

There was a six episode prequel featuring numerous characters in Blood and Sand (though not Spartacus himself), entitled Gods of the Arena.

Thaddeus

Monday, 5 September 2011

After Alexander: the Diadochi

Alexander the Great was a legend in his own lifetime and has been a source of fascination, admiration and sometimes censure ever since. However, the period immediately after his death is sadly not furnished with the same degree of interest either now or at the time (which means that whilst we have a lot of great historical information regarding Alexander’s life we have far less regarding his successors).

The Diadochi were the Successors to Alexander. They were almost entirely his Companions, his close friends and talented lieutenants. The great general Parmenio and his sons did not survive a possibly untrue attempt at regicide during Alexander's reign, and the only other men to rise (certainly in the earliest days) were Eumenes, Alexander’s secretary (and a Greek, to the contempt of his Macedonian rivals) and Antipater, the elderly and cunning viceroy Alexander had left in command of Macedon.

Alexander had a brother, who was mentally disadvantaged, and a very young son, born after his death. The pair was manipulated by the political machinations of those vying for power and finally slaughtered whilst in Macedon.

The territory of Alexander was enormous. It ranged from modern day Albania, Greece and Macedonia in the west to Egypt and the Arabian Peninsula in the south and all the way to Afghanistan and the Indian subcontinent in the east. When Alexander died the Persian Empire had been comprehensively destroyed, the Macedonian war machine was unmatched, even unrivalled, and he left behind a great number of brave and intelligent generals. Too many, perhaps.

Alexander’s lover and chief of the Companions, Hephaestion, had died before the king himself. Craterus, greatest of the generals, had been sent back to Macedon and thus missed the crucial meeting that decided who ought to succeed Alexander.

In the end a Companion named Perdiccas was named regent, but the mood of the assembly was not convivial and he proved unable to retain the loyalty of the other great men who vied for supremacy. Within a few years the men accustomed to following Alexander and enjoying unrelenting success grew displeased and he was assassinated.

Ptolemy was endowed with Egypt, and proved most resilient of the Diadochi. He lived long, his kingdom (as it became) was never taken from him and he founded a dynasty that lasted until Anthony and Cleopatra.

Antipater had allied with Perdiccas and Craterus, but the latter was surprisingly killed in a first battle with Eumenes, the former was murdered and the decision of Antipater to hand Macedonian vice-regal powers to Polyperchon (a Companion) rather than his son (Cassander) plunged the kingdom into prolonged conflict. Ultimately Cassander proved victorious, and founded Thessalonica (which is named after his wife).

Lysimachus got Thrace (modern day Bulgaria), and Seleucus was fostered in Egypt as Ptolemy’s guest, later to acquire the eastern portion of the empire.

And what of the great heart of the Persian Empire, from Turkey to the Arabian Peninsula? That fell to Antigonus Monopthalmus (‘one-eyed’). He alone had the power to dream of reunifying all of Alexander’s lands under one ruler, and that power caused his rivals to combine their forces against him.

The Battle of Ipsus is not especially well-known, unlike Cannae or Issus. However, it was very important. Cassander did not participate, but did send a significant number of Macedonian heavy infantry (in short supply after prolonged warfare), leaving only a token force to hold his own land. Lysimachus and Seleucus did attend, and the latter brought 400 elephants. Both sides had around 70,000 men, with Antigonus having the advantage in cavalry and his enemies more elephants. Also participating for Antigonus were his son Demetrius and a young adventurer called Pyrrhus, who came from Epirus.

A cavalry charge from Demetrus and Pyrrhus defeated and pursued one of the coalition wings, but they charged too far. The two centres closed and the forces of Antigonus were hard-pressed. Demetrius tried repeatedly to return and attack the enemy centre to help his father, but horses are terrified of elephants and the hundreds Seleucus possessed had formed a screen to prevent the son’s return. In the end, Antigonus and any hope of a unified Macedonian superpower lay dead, and his son and Pyrrhus escaped the field to fight another day.

Seleucus took the lion’s share of the land, and formed the Seleucid Empire (which I think gave way to the Parthians, which were themselves consumed from within by a new Persian Empire).

Cassander retained Macedon, but it never rose to the heights it had once known. Lysimachus and Seleucus came to battle when both were in their 70s, and Seleucus won. He had a hugely powerful empire, and began to march on Macedon. However, he was betrayed and killed by Ptolemy Keraunos (a son out of favour with his father of the same name), who briefly was the most powerful man in the world. He was killed himself shortly thereafter by the Gauls.

It remains to be seen whether Alexander would have been able to keep together his vast conquests had he lived, and whether he would have marched west on Italy. Macedonian politics was soaked with blood (his own father had become king by assuming the throne in the stead of his nephew, but it was Alexander rather than Philip who slew Amyntas IV) and rather unstable.

Thaddeus

Saturday, 3 September 2011

Doctor Who: Night Terrors

Hurrah, a New Who episode without River Song.

Night Terrors is a self-contained episode, so no plot arc implications for the Silence or suchlike. It also features guest star Daniel Mays, who was excellent as Keats in the last Ashes to Ashes series.

An eight year old chap called George is scared of monsters at night, specifically in his wardrobe. So terrified, in fact, that his fear manifests itself on the Doctor’s psychic paper, and the Time Lord and the Ponds go hunting for the boy.

They go door-knocking in a tower block. The Doctor finds the right place, and Amy and Rory have a fright in a lift and wake up in a dark, old house.

The old house is a bit strange. There’s a giant glass eye in a drawer, the kitchen utensils are wooden and made to look like copper and the hands of clocks are painted on.

Meanwhile, the Doctor discovered, by playing with his sonic screwdriver, that the wardrobe is actually ‘off the scale’ [for something or other] and becomes almost as worried as George about it. He prevaricates about opening it, eventually does so and learns that George is not actually human as his parents couldn’t have children. He’s a Tenza, an alien cuckoo in the nest that adapts to suit his foster parents’ needs. However, as George is consumed with terror the Doctor and George’s father get sucked into the wardrobe.

Rory and Amy find out they’re not alone, and get cornered by some particularly creepy dolls. Rory escapes but Amy gets caught and transforms into one of the dolls. He and the Doctor, along with the father, are reunited, but surrounded by the dolls. The doll house is inside the wardrobe as is everything (and there’s a lot) George is afraid of. The Doctor calls to George to open the wardrobe, which he does, and ends up inside the doll house. It transpires that George was terrified of rejection, and when his father reassures him the fear disappears and the creepy doll house is no more. Even better, Amy Pond stops being a creepy wooden-head.

Pretty good episode. Especially for young kids it would have been a bit scary, and it’s easy to relate to a kid who’s scared at night, or of monsters, and a parent worried about their child. Definitely better than last week’s.

Thaddeus

Friday, 2 September 2011

The Tale of Sir Edric the Vile, episode 1

So, I was pondering putting up some creative writing ahead of the release of my eBook (hopefully later this year). The problem was that I didn’t want to give away any of that book, and it takes me a while to draft and then rewrite creative stuff.

However, due to my skill and cunning, and not at all because I clicked the wrong folder whilst suffering an explosive sneeze, I found an old miniature comedy, in the style of a play. There are only two episodes, as yet, but it’s written already, so I thought I’d put it up.

Worth stressing that I wrote this a while ago, and my book is not an out and out comedy (although there are quite a few moments of light relief). Anyway, here it is:

Episode 1: A Royal Summons

Scene 1: [Edric approaches the monstrous stone home of Prince Ivan the Bloody, which is protected by a pair of guards]

Edric: I got the urgent summons. Ivan's not in one of his moods, is he?

Guardsman Barry: Oh no, sir, he's cheerier than a jester's birthday.


Scene 2: [A horrid shriek emanates from the door, which is subsequently pierced by a sword, its bloody tip wiggling playfully]

Guardsman Gary: Well, cheeryish. For the prince.


Scene 3: [Edric enters the home, steps over the fresh corpse marinated in its own blood, and approaches Prince Ivan]

Edric: Good day to thee, my liege.


Ivan: Ah, Edric. Good day indeed. Robin here was caught in bed with my sister, so I murdered him to teach him a lesson. I daresay he won't do that again!


Scene 4: [Edric glances nervously at the corpse]

Edric: Indeed not, sire. How is your wife?

Ivan[sighing]: Hilda the Impenetrable lives up to her bloody name. Anyway, I summoned you to spread some good news. The King is dead! Well, almost.


Scene 5: [Ivan swings his sword playfully]

Ivan: The old man's got longpox. Another few weeks and he'll be worm food. The problem is my damned sister, as always. She's ordered Sir Gerald and Alice to hunt down Arnold the Hermit in the Cave of Terrible Darkness.


Scene 6: [Edric nods, relieved not to be better acquainted with the pointy end of Ivan's sword]

Ivan: Arnold is reputed to be the finest healer in the world. Happily, fate gifted me a prophecy last night. Either Arnold or you will meet death in the next month. I'm sure you understand the way the gods work, old bean.

Edric: Indeed, sire. I shall report the Hermit's demise interfrastically.

Thaddeus